Why so sentimental you asked? Why dedicate a post for something which retired a long time ago and personified it by calling it "Companion" ? Same reason why I almost teared when I saw the typewriter in Perks of Being a Wallflower , it brings about who we are today.
My trusty 'walkman' was my friend, my getaway whenever I was feeling sad during P5 to (believe it or not) my poly-days. I did not have a smartphone and during that time I lost my Nokia Xpressmusic at the cinema during year 1, I've carried this super vintage black-and-white phone I had before for a year.
My music, came from that single Disc Player that walked me through hard times, calming me with my favorite music. However, to the ungrateful me, it was bulky. I thought of it a pain to carry such heavy object and had pester my brother to get me an MP3 for my birthday (in exchange of an equally priced Xbox game for his, of cos). Come to think of it, my Disc Player had been neglected ever since I got my current phone a year ago. It was only a few months back when my father ask me for it, saying that he wants to listen to his CD that I took it out from that familiar corner of my drawer and handed it over. I did not expect that it will be the last time I'll ever see it.
The exact same model as mine.
Long lost...
Yesterday, I was looking for it. I looked again for it at that familiar spot; it wasn't there. I went to my parent's room and tried to search for it in every drawer; still wasn't there. It was 3am. My mum told me to sleep, and search for it when I wake up. That's what I did. I woke up and the first thing I did was to ask my dad if he remembered where he put it and he said it had spoiled so he threw it away.
Threw. It. Away.
Those cruel words circled in my still freshly-awake mind. I was still confused on whether it was a horrible nightmare. I walked back to my room and lied on my bed. When I finally realised the reality, I broke down.
I felt that Dad should had given it back to me, let me decide what to do with it and not just throwing it away just because it was a retired un-working device (I wasn't sure if his claim 'un-working' was even trustworthy). With MP3 and smart phones now, those are like cassette players from our generation.
Dad do not like to keep hold of items of the past, hence he felt that whatever can't be used should just be discarded, instead of keeping it for sentimental value, unlike me. Hell, I was so into keeping gifts that I kept the gift wraps as well! I probably can't remember which wrap is for which but I couldn't bare the thought of throwing it away....
It was sad, but I had to let it go. After all, we can't cry over spilled milk. We all have different views and what Dad did was not wrong either.
I had just wished he'd mention it to me, to prevent all this sudden shock.
R.I.P my Old Companion, where ever you (of parts of you) may be now.
Hope you had known how much you meant to me.
Thank you for the hours you've worked to coax me to sleep.
Thank you!
I know how you feel...
ReplyDelete